Lou was often frustrated by the lack of acknowledgment of trans men, as well as the medical and psychological establishments’ belief that gay or bisexual transgender people could not exist. He knew better, of course. From his community connections and research in the archives, Lou not only realized that gay trans men lived in his generation, but also in ages prior. Still, being an out trans person was, and remains, challenging and often dangerous. Few trans people desired to out themselves needlessly, even for the purposes of research and sharing knowledge.
In spite of the risks he’d be undertaking, Lou reached out to professionals and community members as an educator and mentor. Besides publishing newsletters and advice books, he participated in panels and interviews, and attended meet-ups in academic or medical settings, and within the trans community.
The following links are to audio and video recordings of Lou in his role as an educator.
Female to Gay Male Transsexualism: Interview with Dr. Ira Pauly
Dr. Ira Pauly (1930) is a psychologist who, at the time of this interview, was considered an expert on female-to-male transsexualism. Lou reached out to speak to Dr. Pauly about his life and experiences since Dr. Pauly had not spoken to a gay trans man before meeting Lou. In the introduction of the interview, Lou expresses his desire to create a video interview with Dr. Pauly in order to preserve information about his life, as Lou had recently been diagnosed with AIDS. From the interview, we can also hear that Lou visited Dr. Pauly’s classroom, likely to discuss his life and experience with his students.
Part I: Gender and Sexual Orientation (1988)
Digital Transgender Archive Link | 1 hour, 2 minutes
In this part of the interview, Dr. Ira Pauly asks about Lou’s life and experiences with gender and sexuality. Lou provides an overview of his life to the time of the interview, including his interests, family dynamics, school, puberty, sexuality, fantasies, transitioning, and how the people around him reacted to his gender expression. He talks about the process of his transition, from researching in the university library in Milwaukee to joining Gay Liberation movements to moving to San Francisco, and eventually beginning his medical transition. Lou also talks about the difficulties he faced while trying to begin hormone replacement therapy. At the end of part I, Lou emphasizes the importance of recognizing that trans people’s gender is not defined by sexual attraction, and that there are more people like him in the world.
Part II: Living with AIDS (1988)
Digital Transgender Archive Link | 29 minutes
The second part of the interview between Dr. Pauly and Lou focuses on his life after his AIDS diagnosis. Lou also elaborates on topics discussed in part I of the interview, including feeling isolated even within trans support groups, life in the gay communities of San Francisco, and other aspects of his early transition. He also discusses his sexual life and the difficulties he faced while seeking and healing from bottom surgery, also known as genital reconstruction surgery. Lou was first diagnosed with AIDS while healing from complications from his bottom surgery. He also discusses his time after his AIDS diagnosis and what his hopes and intentions were for the rest of his life.
Part III (1989)
Digital Transgender Archive Link | 41 minutes
A year later, Lou returned to Dr. Pauly for a follow-up interview. Dr. Pauly asks Lou to talk about the changes in his life since receiving his AIDS diagnosis and meeting with Dr. Pauly before. Lou discusses the medications he takes and its side effects, the state of his physical health, his experiences with doctors and the community, and the changes he had noticed about his body. He also talks about the social element of living with AIDS, as well as how it parallels with his transsexual experience and activism. He and Dr. Pauly also comment on the way perceptions in the psychological professional community about gay and transgender individuals has changed over time, and talk about what might be different in the future. Lou also talks about maintaining relationships and having sexual encounters as someone with AIDS, as well as how the community changed during the AIDS crisis.
Part IV: (One Year Later) (1990)
Digital Transgender Archive Link | 34 minutes
Lou returned again to Dr. Pauly for a follow-up interview in 1990. In the final part of Lou’s interview, Dr. Pauly recounts Lou’s experience speaking with an audience after watching other videos of him. Lou expresses that he was surprised at how empathetic the audience was while they spoke to him. He also talks about his physical health and the difficulty of having AIDS as a transsexual person medically and socially. Dr. Pauly also describes how he presented Lou’s interview video and work to the American Psychiatric Association, the Harry Benjamin International Gender Dysphoria Association, and other psychologists, to help with the goal of recording Lou’s reality in professional psychological communities. Lou expresses that his “wish has come true” that discussing female-to-male transsexuals has become a more open topic in psychology. He also talks about how acceptance of gay/same-gender-attracted trans people has improved over time–even in the short span between Lou’s initial interview with Dr. Pauly and this one. Lou also reflects on his feelings of mortality after living longer than his doctors initially presumed after his diagnosis. He also discusses his ongoing sexual life and the relationships he was having at the time.
The Life of Lou 